The Sovereign Mind

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Posts Tagged ‘consumerism

The iPhone Is So 2008

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As Christmas approaches, I was recently caught up in a wave of irrational consumerism. I craved a fancy smartphone to replace my PDA and pre-paid cell-phone (yes, I’m a cheapskate). Of course, the iPhone, being the coolest of the cool, and the status symbol of the day, was at the top of my list. But after seeing the price tag on both the device and the plan that you have to buy with it, I started to look for cheaper options. I did find some smartphones that are much cheaper and meet my needs, but the cell phone plans that come with them still seemed pricey. I didn’t really need a “data plan” for extra $30 a month since 95% of my time I’m within range of a WiFi signal that I already pay for, and most of the remaining time I’m driving, when I probably shouldn’t be checking eBay anyway. And I don’t even need 500 minutes when 95% of my calls are to my wife, which would be unlimited under the family plan anyway. But alas, there aren’t many options for cheapskates like me.

I pondered on the close-mindedness of cell phone companies to fail to provide a cheaper alternative to their expensive services. I wonder if they know that there are people like me who spent hours browsing their selection online, only to decide not to purchase. Or maybe I’m just weirder more unique than I think…

Anyway, I decided to do something about it. If the cell phone companies weren’t going to provide a cheaper alternative, then I would. Presenting the “iTape N3G” (N3G = “Not 3G”). The philosophy of the iTape is simple: the main idea of a smartphone is that you really shouldn’t need to carry around both your PDA and your cellphone separately. Seriously, if God intended you to need to carry two separate devices, he would have created us with two hands…

So for those who just want a PDA and a cell-phone combined, but don’t need all of the bells and whistles of an iPhone or some other fancy smartphone, then the iTape is for you. You can find a role of it at any hardware store for about $2.99. Some assembly is required, but this makes it very customizable. The standard version just requires putting your PDA and your cell-phone back-to-back, and then wrapping the iTape around a few times. Voila! Instant smartphone!

Since the end result is *virtually indistinguishable from the iPhone, both in features and in looks, you can look just as cool as those iPhone users for about $397 less, and you can still have your PDA and phone in the same device. Cool huh? Especially as everyone and their dog is losing their jobs, “MacGyver meets Steve Jobs” is sure to be the trend of 2009.

*virtually indistinguishable should be interpreted as “somewhat similar if you squint your eyes from a distance”.


Written by Mike

December 9, 2008 at 9:24 pm

Posted in society

Tagged with , ,