The Sovereign Mind

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Posts Tagged ‘election 2012

My Predictions for 2012

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Making predictions is a no-lose proposition. If I’m wrong, I can point to all of the unpredictable things that occurred that threw off my guess. I’m a right, then I’m a genius. So here are my predictions for the 2012 presidential election:

  1. The race will be decided by those who are currently undecided about how they will vote in 2012.
  2. Humans will vote overwhelmingly for another human. Polls show that 100% of humans vote for their kind, making humans the most identity-driven voters of all other groups.
  3. To save money, and to maintain their first-in-the-nation status, New Hampshire will move up their primary election for the 2016 presidential election to November of 2012 to coincide with the 2012 general election. Why not kill two birds with one stone?
  4. The Republican party, not to be outdone by their counterpart, will create the concept of “Super-duper delegates”, who are least twice of powerful at the puny “Super-delegates” of the Democratic party (and they have cool capes). The two groups will clash in the ultimate struggle, punctuated by the exclamations such as “Kablooommm!” until eventually only one team will emerge from the rubble victorious and man-kind will be saved… at least for another four years…
  5. News programs will ditch the “magic” multi-touch maps (those are *soooo* 2008), in favor of old-school flannel boards.
  6. In the wake of Joe the Plummer, other industries will attempt to win influence by adopting their own political personas. Meet Sally the Accountant. Ben the Used Car Salesman. And Jeffrey the Microbiologist.
  7. The candidate who is behind in late October will continually downplay the importance of the polls.
  8. Barack Obama, if he’s elected this time around, will replace his “Change” message with his inspirational “Keep Things The Way They Are” message.
  9. In addition to the voter reaction graphs at the bottom of the screen during debates, there will also be heart monitors tracking the candidates’ pulses, complete with lengthy analysis afterward.
  10. The media will proclaim that 2012 is the most negative campaign season yet. What happened to the good ‘ol days where candidates ran on the issues? You know, like in 2008.

We’ll see if I’m right. Feel free to leave your predictions in the comments.


Written by Mike

October 30, 2008 at 11:20 pm

Posted in politics

Tagged with ,